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The room is filled with lamp smoke. In the center is a table covered in charts and maps. The only light is a single lantern above the desk. Hunched over the table is a man. The man stared down at a map on his desk. Furrowing his eyebrows he started to tap his fingers. “Hmmm, we sailed east for four days, then north for two. That’s when the storm hit us.”

Slowly he reached under his desk and started to pull out a drawer, as he did he heard a commotion up on deck. Pulling the drawer open the rest of the way he pulled out his divider and set it on the map. Turning around he walked to his door. Reaching for the handle he hesitated, shaking his head he opened the door and walked out of the room.

Out in the hall he heard the pounding of feet on deck. Quickening his step the captain moved to the stairs. He quickly climbed them and hesitated again before throwing the door open. “Man overboard!” the shout came from above.” Climbing out from below decks the captain looked up. “Man overboard on the starboard side!” shouted the lookout.

The captain rushed starboard and looked where the man was pointing. Seeing nothing he shouted to his crew for a spyglass.

Within seconds the deck hand rushed to his side holding a spyglass. Picking it up, he raised it to his eye. True enough, there was a man where the lookout had pointed. Floating in the water about a half mile off was a young man, floating in the ocean with his arm around a barrel.

“Turn to starboard! Full speed ahead!”

To be continued...
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Author's Comments

Major changes since the last draft. Comment please.

Check my progress:
Draft 1
Draft 2
Draft 3 (This one)

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:iconbryare-thorne:
I want to know what happens next.
Something pretty minor, but in the first paragraph who is he talking to? If he's talking to himself then say something like: he muttered to himself, retracting their route on the map with a calloused finger. Or something along those lines. Also, you can always use the "he thought" after all, I assume it's more of a novel than a screenplay right?

--
Well, 4 out of 5 doctors agree that I am actually insane.
-Hayley Stark in Hardy Candy

"Often, I get the feeling that the story is really happening somewhere and all I'm doing is trying to work out the best way to tell it."
-Garth Nix
:iconsivin-embereyes:
xD right, yeah hes supposed to be talking to himself.
Ill get that fixed in the next draft.

--
Comment on my stuff plz

End of Days OCT - Audition and Round 1

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June 10
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